Like many New York City couples sharing an apartment roughly the size of a larger shoe box, Jen and Jonnie dream of having enough real estate for table linens or china dishes. Until a powerball lottery is won or some unimaginable career break comes for either of them, they will have to do without. Instead, enjoy the listed registry of hypothetical items and services a newlywed couple in NYC might need to begin their lives together.
Rent. A belligerent, monthly reminder of how broke one is. To quote a certain politician, "the rent is too damn high."
Keep the sweltering summers and old man winter at bay by powering the National Grid and ConEdison utilities.
Sure, the city needs to fund the intricate workings of the Manhattan Transit Authority, but at what cost? Give Jen and Jonnie an unlimited monthly Metrocard.
Massacre of the Roaches by Carroll Gardens Top Exterminators. Jen is all for pacifism, but those jerks are huge. Did we mention that last month Jonnie learned that they can fly?
New Yorkers love to outsource their chores. Our buddy Moe down the block does our laundry at his pick-up/drop-off laundromat. Thanks, Moe!
New Yorkers spend multiple fortunes on pizza. Since Jen and Jonnie moved in, that number has seen a significant spike. A year on pizza at Vinny's.
A can of Brooklyn Roasting Company coffee beans costs $14, but knowing them, that price will continue to creep upwards.
A fancy haircut from Woofs 'n Whiskers for a fluffy cat.
Jonnie needs a bike to get to work. Even though he enjoys reading on the subway, watching four packed F trains go by isn't enjoyable.
Jen needs a bike to run errands around town. She would drive, but then she'd get locked up for not having a license. We can't afford that.
Fact: Jonnie and Jen have cooked dinner twice since moving to Brooklyn. Though their kitchen could be mistaken for a closet, they want to use it. Groceries from Fresh Direct!
Jen found a dream-like screenprinting studio nearby. Help fund her membership.
Jen and Jonnie work day and night. Give them a reason to get out and enjoy the city with a membership to the MoMA.
Since living in SF, Macy and Winston only eat organic Halo Spot's Stew. Feed our kitties!